More Than I Can Say
by Kamasa Chan
Summary: There is only one person it could be if a letter comes from Hueco Mundo. Gin/Rangiku
1. Cat's Tongue

**Disclaimer**: Bleach and all related subjects are the property of Tite Kubo. I just rent the characters for 75 cents an hour. I try to write fast, but this explains why I never have any money...

_My first Bleach fic! Well... no, I wrote a short one-shot before, but one of my hall mates at CTY stole it and lost it, so yeah... I got this idea from my friends, and she said she got the prompt from somewhere, so I'm sorry if I am copying anyone! _

1. Cat's Tongue

There is something in existence called "mail", and that very fact was the reason why tenth-division's Rangiku Matsumoto was in a bad mood. The disgruntled Shinigami sat down heavily at her desk with a large box overflowing with fanmail in her arms.

"What's the point of sending fanmail anyways?" she grumbled, tearing through what must have been her twentieth envelope. "The sender always writes something like 'From your admirer', so it's impossible to send any back. And some of these are really irrational…" Rangiku then let out a laugh. She was criticizing others of being irrational?

Finally, only one letter remained unopened. Rangiku frowned at the pink envelope in her hand. The company "Nekojita Milk Candy" was printed in the corner and a picture of a white cat with its tongue sticking out adorned the front. What was this place? She had never heard of it before, so why were they sending her mail? Rangiku opened the envelope to find that the folded sheet of paper inside had her name written on it in a thin, spidery handwriting. Her frown deepened as she recognized the handwriting, and she felt the urge to crumple it and toss it into the fire. Nevertheless, she unfolded it and began to read.

_My dear Ran-chan,_

_Hey! How are you? I haven't seen it in quite a while. I know that I have no right to send letters to you, but I felt as though I needed to apologize for my sudden leaving. I didn't want to hurt all those people; to leave the Soul Society in chaos and anger like I did, but it was necessary. You probably don't understand, and I don't think that you will unless I explain it to you face to face instead of through paper. I'm sorry…_

_It's so boring here in Hueco Mundo! There's no one here except Aizen, Tosen, Arrancars, and a bunch of Gillians. Aizen is too busy commanding his underlings and feeding his ego and Tosen follows in his footsteps. That is very unwise, as Aizen always runs into walls. I mean that both figuratively and literally because he doesn't see very well without his glasses. The Arrancars are all conceited and none of them seem to like me, and the Gillians are numbnuts. It's like trying to talk to potatoes; the Gillians just grunt and stare at you. I really wanted to talk to you, Ran-chan, like we used to. Remember when we used to live together when we were really little? In the dead of winter we used to sit as close to the fire as we could without getting burned and just talk through the night because you were too scared to go to sleep. I always found that so funny, especially since you always fell asleep while I was the one who ended up staying awake. I just had to sit there with you leaning against me because I didn't want to wake you and go through that whole "I can't go to sleep!" speech. Not that I minded, though._

_Speaking of that, I also truly meant it when I said I wouldn't mind if you had held on to me a little longer when we parted. I don't want to sound like a pervert when I say that! I just meant that… well… I can't really explain. Maybe I am a pervert? If so, please excuse yet another imperfection of me! I just miss you, Ran-chan! How can I not? I really want your company here. You made me smile. I mean really smile._

_I hope that you are well, and I hope that Seireitei is too. I would feel like scum if I had hurt you. I feel like scum now, actually… Did we leave too much damage behind? Sorry if we did! But Aizen's plans are extreme when needed. Speaking of him, I hear him coming down the hall now so I better wrap this up. He wouldn't be pleased if he knew I were writing to you, and I'll ask that you not tell anyone back in the city about this either? For safety issues, you know. _

_Love forever,_

_Gin_

_P.S. I know that I don't deserve it, but I would really love it if you were to write back to me! If you do decide to, please send it back in the envelope it came in. Aizen will become suspicious if I receive mail from the Soul Society._

"…" Glued to her chair in shock, Rangiku finally remembered how to breathe and did. She reread the letter once, twice, and again before the message registered in her head. Gin was sending her mail…? But why would he do that? Even though they had grown up together, she had felt their strong bond dwindle through the past years serving the Thirteen Gotei.

"…Should I reply? My captain would kill me. I think he still hasn't gotten over the fact that Aizen and Gin almost killed Momo-chan… But Gin did defy Aizen and write to me all the way from Hueco Mundo… How did he even get it sent here? Did he tell one of the Gillians to bring it over here to the Soul Society?" Murmuring to herself, Rangiku plucked a fresh sheet of paper from the disarrayed pile on her desk and retrieved her brush from the inkpot.

"Gin… If it weren't him, I wouldn't bother." She dipped the tip of the brush into the ink and, despite her hand aching from hours of paperwork, began to write.

After she completed a letter that she deemed satisfactory, Rangiku lightly fanned the ink to dry it and sighed. "Somehow, I hope he writes back…"

_-o-_

* * *

_Erm... I hope that Gin wasn't too OCC in this, but I got the impression that his attitude is kind of like that around Rangiku. Sorry, the pairing is abbreviated as Gin/Ran, which is a lot like Shin/Ran, as in Shinichi Kudo and Ran Mori from Detective Conan, and I write for that pairing too, so it has a bit of Shin/Ran air... Very sorry! I hope that you will read on, please?_

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	2. Brightened

**Disclaimer**: Bleach and all related subjects are property of Tite Kubo. I just rent the characters for 75 cents an hour. I try to write fast, but this explains why I never have any money...

* * *

Babysitting a bunch of whiners that did not like you and most definitely did not cooperate with you was never fun. Especially if those whiners could kill you on whim. Having decided all of this, Gin Ichimaru staggered into his room and shut the door behind him, sighing in exhaustion. He honestly didn't mind the Arrancars, but none of them seemed to tolerate him.

"Goodness, if Aizen-taichou had told me that I'd be doing this day after day, I would have considered staying back in Seireitei…" he moaned. "Guess I can't do anything 'bout it now." He slipped his white haori over his head and draped it carelessly over the back of the chair at his desk. Something fluttered off of his desk.

"Hm? What is this now?" Gin removed his robes down to his nagajuban and picked up the thing. His face lit up when he recognized the pink envelope. "Well now! I guess she does care about me, even if it's just a little bit."

Gin sat down on his bed and bounced up and down a couple of times like a small child with the letter in hand. He slid his thumb under the flap and retrieved the sheet of paper inside. He decided that he was completely happy, and would be even if the paper was blank, or if the only content was cursing him to the fiery pits of hell, or if she said she never wanted to hear or see him again. Gingerly holding the delicate paper between his pale fingertips, Gin unfolded it and began to read.

_Gin, wherever you may be,_

_First, I'd like to say that I am relieved that you are not dead— yet. Secondly, you should know that since you are not dead, I wish to kill you. How could you just take off like that and leave Seireitei in turmoil like you did? That was borderline unforgivable. But even though you hurt Momo-chan, tried to kill Rukia and hit Byakuya instead, and followed that Sosuke Aizen, you didn't do as much damage as he and Kaname Tosen did. So… I just might forgive you sometime down the road. Might. You deserve to be in the presence of all those numbnut Gillians! (I would stick my tongue out at you, except I am a grown woman and that is below my maturity. Well, I still want to!) But I do hope that _you_ are not running into walls. Well, maybe I don't…_

_Yes, I do remember when we were children. It wasn't funny, Gin! I had a reason for not wanting to sleep! I died in the human world in the winter when I was asleep, remember? And the conditions in Rukongai were as they were… Anyhow, I'm sorry if I inconvenienced you. But yes, you are a pervert. I wish that I could have held on to you longer, too. Not because I liked it, but because I could secure you and make sure that you did not do any more harm to the Soul Society and all who live here. Now all I can do to protect the Soul Society is to fight against whatever Aizen unleashes against us. _

_I miss you too, Gin. But… I miss the old Gin. I miss the boy I grew up with, the boy I lived with, the boy who saved my life, the boy who was my best friend. What happened to him? Did he fade among the years as you grew, or did he disappear altogether when you were accepted into _

_squad five under Aizen? Or is he still there, only masked beneath the layers of lies and deceit the three of you left with us back here in Seireitei? I don't know exactly what it was, but I still miss him. I want him back. Um… well, respectively, I suppose. Don't take that the wrong way!_

_We've patched up here in Seireitei, and we've healed everyone who was injured. Only Momo-chan is still unconscious. She's in a coma, and Hitsugaya-taichou watches over her and speaks to her sometimes, but she still does not wake. It seems that she can, but she does not want to. Momo-chan has too many emotional scars as well as a broken heart due to Aizen's betrayal. I can relate to her. _

_Well… I hope that you are safe and healthy, and I'll ask that you not die in Hueco Mundo, okay? Just… be careful, Gin. Don't do anything that might get you killed, even if it's under Aizen's orders. I don't know what it's like there in Hueco Mundo, so I have no idea how things are. I… I want you to come home safely, and soon if possible. I miss you, you know, even though I don't really want to. Don't forget that, you foxy-faced bastard._

_Sincerely,_

_Rangiku Matsumoto_

_P.S. Did you come up with the "Nekojita Milk Candy" thing? I'm sorry, but it's a rather stupid name. "Nekojita" is a metaphor, even though it translates into "cat's tongue". I get it, but it is rather childish… And this is coming from someone whose zanpakutou is named "Haineko". _

"Ah, Ran-chan, you always criticize me, don't ya?" Gin chortled as he read the postscript. "My lovely, lovely Ran-chan." He ran his fingers through his silver hair and reread the letter. He especially lingered on the places where Rangiku had expressed how much he had hurt her inside. His ever-present grin turned down at the corners and he sighed.

Groaning in frustration, Gin flopped backwards onto his pillow and held the letter at arm's length in the air. How could he somewhat make it up to her? He had broken her heart; he would never be able to forgive himself for that. Sighing again, Gin sat up and looked out the window at the eternal night outside. Suddenly the grin appeared again and widened as he thought of something he could do.

Ignoring the fact that it was past midnight and he should get some sleep, Gin swung himself out of bed and hopped to his desk. He picked his thinnest brush out of the jar and burnt the end of the bamboo, charring it. Then he used Shinsou to carefully whittle the black end to a point. After completing his letter to Rangiku, he flipped the brush around and held the blackened point to a fresh sheet of paper. He might have to sacrifice his brush, but he figured it was worth it if it was for Ran-chan.

_-o-_

_Yay! Another chapter is finished! I love Gin, so I tried to make him a little more... likable? Like the "Arrancar Encyclopedia" bits. Again, I hope he wasn't too OCC. Hm, now I'm starting to think that I've switched Rangiku and Gin's personalities... Just to make it clear, Gin burnt the end of the handle of the brush. My friend Irene came up with the "foxy-faced bastard" thing with me. Blame her too!! Yeah... Please read on if you wish!_


	3. Ashy

_Sorry for the late post!! I'm twelve, and I have summer reading to do as well as Chinese-school homework and "Usotsuki (my own manga)", and yeah... So thank you for waiting and reading!_

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"Why do I have to stay in here?" Rangiku whined, drumming her fingers on her desk. "My captain got to go to the real world; I want to go too! I want to go harass Ichigo! I want to eat Orihime's yummy cooking!" She slammed her teacup down, sloshing the tepid green liquid onto the wooden surface. Impatiently, Rangiku took her handkerchief to sop up the mess and proceeded to toss it on the floor when her desk was dry.

"Um, Rangiku-san?"

Rangiku looked up in surprise. "Hanatarou-kun? What brings you here?" The timid boy from the fourth division jumped slightly.

"I—I came to give you this. It was mailed to me, but it was addressed to you inside." Hanatarou flushed. "I didn't mean to open it, Rangiku-san! It has my name on the envelope, so I thought—."

"No, no, it's okay," Rangiku reassured. "I'll take it. Thank you, Hanatarou-kun." Hanatarou handed her the envelope and left, scurrying out in a mouse-like fashion. Rangiku laughed and turned to observe the envelope. It was made of a heavy green paper, and the name "Hanatarou Yamada" was printed neatly in the center in an even, formal hand. Lifting the opened flap, Rangiku pulled out a white sheet with her name written on the front in a familiar handwriting. She gasped; Gin! He was still writing to her? Hadn't the writing ended with her letter?

Nervously, she unfolded the paper to find another letter. Eagerly now, Rangiku smoothed it out and began to read.

_Lovely, lovely Ran-chan,_

_Thank you very much for writing back to me! You made my day, you did. I am relieved that you are doing well! Again, I'd like to apologize for hurting you. Like I said, I am scum. I don't mind that you want to kill me. If I were you, I'd want to kill me, too. Does that make sense? I'm not sure if it does, but I'll let you decide. I'm sorry if I sound like I'm babbling, but I'm just very happy that you wrote to me! I will treasure that letter of yours forever. I'm going to keep it in the envelope under my pillow. And yes… I admit that the name I made up is stupid. I'm not very creative, you see. And I would be grateful forever if you do decide to forgive me, but I don't truly deserve it. _

_I'm sorry if I changed too much, over the years, Ran-chan. I am still Gin Ichimaru. At least, I hope that I am. Life in Seireitei is much different than life in Rukongai, and so is being in the thirteen Gotei… But truthfully, I wish that I could return to the way I was, too. It was so great being a kid. No worries, no troubles, and I could live with you. Oh dear me, I sound like a pervert again, don't I? This is proving to be problem, it is. But the fact that I love you is inevitable, sweetheart. I give you permission to kill me._

_Please tell Hinamori-san that I am sorry for hurting her, and, if he allows it, apologize to Hitsugaya-taichou as well. Also, please inform Hinamori-san that it was not me who killed Aizen. I think it would be best if she also knew that he is not actually dead, but living well in Hueco Mundo, but perhaps it would be a bit too hard for her. I don't want to damage her spirit even further. If I do, I'd likely be killed by your captain. He's so unbelievably powerful, and I don't think that I can defeat him! I do respect Shiro-chan now after our last fight. To be honest, I think I would have been killed that time if you hadn't stepped in. Thank you! Also, please say sorry to Hanatarou-kun for sending the letter through him. I figured that I needed a new sending method, and I thought that he would give us the least problems. _

_Have you ever wanted to just drop onto the floor, fling your limbs in all different directions, and just yell? That's what I really want to do now. I don't want to stay here in Hueco Mundo for much longer, but I can't really do anything about it. I just can't stand seeing so many folks being hurt and killed. Now I'm starting to regret leaving Seireitei, you know? Also, I feel bad about leaving you behind. _(Gin drew a smiley-face here.) _I miss the life we used to share, lying out on a hillside in the summer in the afternoon, just talking and talking until the sky was almost black with millions of stars sparkling up above. Well, some of the stars were fireflies, but they were nice too. Being a kid was so good compared to my life now! I never got swallowed by anything back in Rukongai… Yes, I was swallowed. By a giant blue worm. It was not fun._

_Even though I am away, I still have responsibilities, so I am sorry to say that I must be getting to sleep soon (it's nearing daybreak now). I would have finished sooner, but I was working on something more consuming before. Your letters make me happy, so I'd like to hear from you again! So I will leave off here, since I must retain my energy for… directing a group of Gillians through an underground labyrinth. I do not know why, but I don't care to ask. _

_Love, love, love,_

_Your foxy-faced bastard Gin_

_P.S. Since you began your letter with "Wherever you may be", I've decided to show you. Unfold the envelope and remove the sheets of rice paper. I hope that it's not too damaged, or too poorly done._

Rangiku raised her eyebrows. She set down the letter and returned her attention to the green envelope.

"What in…?" Turning it over in her fingers, Rangiku found a small tab in the envelope that held it together. She gingerly unfolded it and removed about three or four sheets of delicate paper and gasped. "'Too poorly done?'"

It was a charcoal drawing of a nighttime desert. A shining orb, pure white amid the pitch darkness of the sky, represented the moon. Light shadowing around the perimeter of the moon 

made it look like it was glowing. The sand dunes, also sparking white, were shaded to look three-dimensional. Trees without bark and leaves dotted the dunes, also bone-white but ashy-looking. The desert was eerie and mysterious looking, but was also somehow magical and beautiful.

"…so this is Hueco Mundo, huh? No wonder why Gillians are so unintelligent. They get no sun." Rangiku laughed. "Even so… this place kind of looks like the place where Gin and I first met." Still murmuring to herself, Rangiku carefully placed the letter and drawing, making sure not to smudge the charcoal, into her drawer on top of the other letter and slid it closed.

"I think that I will have to write back," she sighed. But even as she grumbled and complained about her aching hand and boring life, the small smile at her lips never left.

_-o-_

_Did you like it? Yes, this is a back and forth letter thing, but I promise that the last letter will be short in order to make room for a plan I have. I know that it was a little short, but I don't have that much time anymore... TT. Posts will probably be a little late since school is starting, but I'll do my best! Yay!_ _You know... lately I've been speaking Japanese, since I figured that just reading Japanese was useless unless I understood it... And I've been speaking with a Kansai accent... patted on the shoulder by Gin_

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	4. Sweet

_Hello again! Thank you for reading! My newest chapter in my Gin/Ran fic! School starts very soon... AAAHHH!! I apologize for my poor conduct..._

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"Ow… This. Is. Murder. Literally, this will kill me! Ah…" Gin sat down on his bed holding his shoulder gingerly, his eyebrows knitted in worry. Blood swelled out from under his hand, staining his white haori crimson. "Aizen will not be happy with getting me extra water to wash this. But it is his fault that he made me overlook training. Yammy was never one with a gentle touch. And Ulqiorra doesn't go easy on anyone either. My goodness…"

Gently Gin removed his robes and examined his injury. A deep gash ran from his left shoulder to his elbow. He winced; he was lucky compared to Grimmjow, at least. Gin retrieved his medicine box from his closet and pulled out antiseptic and bandages.

"This must do for now, I suppose," he murmured, tying the bandage with his right hand and teeth. He stood up and placed his supplies on his desk. "Hm? An envelope?" Gin picked up the envelope and grinned. "Ran-chan!" Gin happily opened the envelope and pulled out the letter inside. A flowery scent hit him when he did, but it was a sweet smell. Laughing at the thought of Rangiku splashing perfume on the paper, Gin unfolded the letter, the pain in his arm becoming non-existent.

_Dear Gin,_

_You need a serious reality check if you think that your drawing was poorly done. It looks professional! Hueco Mundo is nothing like I'd imagined. It actually looks like where we first met, you know? You were always the artistic type… kind of. You used to take the ashes from our fires and make ink, and then paint pictures and sell them in town, or in another district. That's probably what kept us alive all those years. Thank you, Gin. I felt so useless back then! _

_Though it is probably against my sense of justice, I do forgive you. In a sense. Perhaps you have suffered enough by staying over there in Hueco Mundo. I would have liked to see you sprawl out on the floor and scream, Gin. However… I may have to take up your offer of my murdering you if you call me "sweetheart" again. Sorry, it's too awkward for me. It feels weird to be referred to as "Ran-chan", even. I've been "Rangiku Matsumoto" for so long now that I can't get used to anything else. Perhaps I've changed over the years as well. _

_I told Momo-chan that you apologize to her. She gave no visible reaction, as usual, but her heartbeat increased. I don't know if it was because of shock or anger, or anything else, but she did hear me. Maybe she will forgive you as well when she wakes up. I also apologized to Hanatarou-kun, but he didn't think much of it. I didn't tell Hitsugaya-taichou, though, as he may not be as forgiving, and I didn't inform Momo-chan about Aizen. I also thing that she is too fragile at the moment. But… you're a nice person. You aren't as bad as everyone else thinks._

_This may be the wrong time to ask… but how and why did you get swallowed by a worm? I'm concerned about you. Hueco Mundo must be an interesting place. And I miss our summer nights, too. They were always comforting. I used to sneak out of my dorm at night during summers in the Shinigami Academy and lie down on the roof to stare at the stars. They were _

_always so beautiful, and made me think back to our childhood. You know, it's funny. I can't say "my childhood" when I'm talking with you. It's always "our childhood" because you were such a big part of it. It sounds so corny, right? Well, it's true._

_Take care of yourself over there, okay? I want you to come back safely. I have to go now, there's an alert in the real world, and I'm up for the leaving group! I'm sorry about the brevity of this letter, but I am running short on time. _

_Love,_

_Rangiku_

_P.S. About the perfume… I wanted to give something to you in return of the drawing, but I can't draw for anything. So, I decided to scent the paper. I asked Orihime, she's one of the ryoka that came to Seireitei, what to do, and she suggested that I do this. It's something that humans do, apparently. It's so strange… If what you say about keeping these under your pillow is true, then perhaps the scent will give you sweet dreams. Orihime told me that too. Hm…_

Gin laughed again. "Of course the aromatherapy will be effective, but any word of yours is enough to give me sweet dreams, Ran-chan." He ran his fingers through his silver hair. "Ah… Ouch… I'd forgotten." Gin had used his left arm, which was now throbbing painfully. Ignoring the pain, Gin put back his medicine box in his closet and sat down at his desk. He pulled sheets of paper from his drawer and used some of the water from the jug on his windowsill to make a fresh batch of ink.

"I have so much to say, but I too am deprived of time. I was given only an hour to tend to my injury, and I've already used half an hour. I suppose I can shirk my duties and just stay here, but Aizen will like that as much as he likes giving me water. He does favor Kaname over me, I must say… More and more, I want to go back to the Soul Society. I want to see sunlight again. Or, at least, I'd like to see Ran-chan again."

Sighing with a sad smile, Gin began to write his letter when a knock sounded at his door.

"Hm? Did someone come to check on me? I really doubt it. Or maybe they've come to get me back to my job early." Gin got up to open the door. His face contained only utter surprise when he saw who had come to visit. "Oh my… I must say, you are the last person I would have expected to come here."

"Hauuu…."

_-o-_

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_

Sorry Gin! I pick on him too much, don't I? And, like Rangiku, I apologize for the brevity of this chapter. The further this little fic goes, the shorter the letters will become. Sorry about that, but that's the way it's been planned out in my head. This chapter was kinda inspired by my relationship with my own childhood friend. Well, more like childhood enemies with a few nice moments. We've grown apart too. (Gin would also like to inform you that he feels like locking Aizen in a closet with a Gillan to show him how it feels to be stuck with one for hours. Anyone willing to help with the cause?)


	5. Psychology

_Yay, another chapter! Gin Ichimaru: "I have plot bunnies." Indeed he does..._

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"…Seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, and twelve. There we go! All twelve medical reports you asked for!"

Isane Kotetsu accepted the stack of forms with a smile. "Thank you, Rangiku-san, you handed them in right on time." Rangiku shook her head.

"No, no, I should be handing them in sooner, Isane-chan. I always make you have to run over to our squad office and get them personally. I'm sorry." She laughed. "I really need to get my act together, don't I?"

"No, Rangiku-san. Your habits make your personality!" Isane said. "Of course, improving your times would be wonderful, but don't change too much."

Rangiku smiled. "Thanks," she mumbled, thinking back to her letters with Gin. They had been discussing the same topic recently.

"Ah…! Rangiku-san! Perfect timing!" Hanatarou came through the doorway carrying a large box. "Thank you for coming down to Squad Four. I have another letter for you. This one was mixed up with Ogidou-san's fanmail."

"Ogidou? You mean your eighth-seat, Harunobu Ogidou?" Rangiku asked. "He is popular with the girls and all, with his good looks…"

Isane blushed. "H-he's not all looks, really. He is really nice and helpful, and even though he isn't the most powerful Shinigami in our squad, he has healed a lot of fatal injuries," she protested, and immediately turned a deeper shade of scarlet. Yasochika Iemura snorted audibly at the desk across the room and buried himself up to his sunglasses in paperwork.

"Oh, jealous, are you?" Rangiku teased. A low growl came from the blond in response. Laughing again, Rangiku turned back to Hanatarou. "Thank you for getting me my letter."

"Not at all, Rangiku-san," Hanatarou answered, handing an envelope to her. "But… why do they always come to the Fourth Division?" Rangiku felt herself freeze momentarily before smiling again.

"I have no idea. Maybe it's to send it discreetly so it can't be traced?" she lied. Hanatarou frowned slightly, but he nodded. "I suppose so. Must be nice to get fanmail…" He scurried away with a pink tint in his cheeks.

Anxiety surged through Rangiku as she held the letter. "I should get going now," she told Isane. "I'll see you tomorrow at the Shinigami Women's Association Meeting, okay?" Isane nodded. "See you then, Rangiku-sa—"

"And," Rangiku interrupted, grinning deviously, "I bet that Ogidou-kun wouldn't say no to a date with a girl like you, Isane-san." She winked, and left Isane flushing red at her desk. "'Bye to you too, Iemura." Another growl rose from the miffed Shinigami.

In the privacy of her own room, Rangiku opened Gin's letter. To her surprise, there were many places where the brush had slipped and even some small bloodstains, making some of the words nearly illegible.

_My Ran-chan,_

_Before I begin, I'd like to apologize for the state of this letter. You see, I received a visit from a Hollow here by the name of Wonderweiss Margera, and he insists on getting me back to work on the command of Tosen. I was injured while working and was allotted time to head my wound, but apparently Aizen wants me back early. Goodness, the man doesn't care for his subordinates, does he? No, no, I shouldn't pen such rude thoughts. But… I'll still recite them in my head. You won't tell, will you, Ran-chan?_

_It appears that this Orihime-san is right. My dreams have been very sweet lately, and I feel better in the morning when I wake up. The only problem is, Hollows with sensitive smell have asked me why I smell like a woman. Laugh if you will, but I chose not to answer those questions. The truth could get me into a lot of trouble, you know. I've been told that my pale skin and… foxy-faced looks are feminine. This rather puts me out, because I was half-albino when I was born, and I inherited many of my mother's genes. I don't suppose I can fix that, and I have no choice but to stay pale since there is no sun here! Ah…_

_But enough of my complaints. I used to watch stars at night too! That was one of the best times of summer in Seireitei. Why didn't you tell me that you were out as well? We could have gazed at the heavens together like in the old days. However, that would probably have caused suspicions about our relationship. Why would two teenage childhood friends sneak out of their rooms at night and meet in a private place? Oh, dear me, I yet again sound like a pervert… This is becoming a problem, is it not? Oh dear, oh dear…_

_About the worm… I honestly do not know why it decided to swallow me. Perhaps it was hungry, it didn't like me, or Aizen asked it to try to do me in? I do not know, but I have been avoiding him even more ever since the incident. I haven't spoken to him much to begin with since we arrived in Hueco Mundo. He doesn't tell me much about anything. I think he's beginning to lose his trust in me. He still does give me orders and ranks me above the Arrancars, but still… _

_Please apologize to Hanatarou-kun yet again for sending my letters through him. I do not mean to take advantage of him, but I can't deliver these to you directly. Remind me, I must thank Hanatarou-kun for being our "go-between", respectively. That is, if he is willing to forgive me along with the rest of the Soul Society if I ever do return. And I thank you, Ran-chan, for believing in me when no one else does. But even I do not see it; how am I a nice person? I _

_tricked poor Hinamori-san with false words of comfort, and she was severely injured because of it, almost killed. I am very ashamed of having committed such a heinous crime._

_I do wish to return safely to Seireitei. I may be banished from the entire Soul Society, or be thrown in jail for eternity, or something along the lines of that, but I would gladly go along with whatever they give me if I can only see you again, Ran-chan. And I tried to call you "Rangiku Matsumoto" once, but it just didn't feel right. So I'm sorry, but you will always be Ran-chan to me. And unfortunately, Wonderweiss is not the only one striving to get me back to work. I hear Tosen calling me as well. _

_Your Foxy-faced Bastard,_

_Gin_

_P.S. I wish to know, why is there always a postscript at the end of our letters? Do we have things to say that can't be fitted into the letter's body, or is it simply because of a habit we've fallen into? I do wonder…_

Rangiku lifted her eyebrows in amusement. Why _did_ she always include a "P.S."? Gin did bring up some of the strangest points in the middle of conversation. But… that was Gin. He wouldn't be the same if he didn't do what he did.

Without thinking, Rangiku picked up her brush and paper. Perhaps, she thought as she dipped her brush into the inkwell, this letter writing was becoming a habit as well?

"Gin, Gin… You do make the oddest observations."

_-o-_

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I'm sorry, the letter was a little short. I suppose that Gin really had to go back to being cut up by angry Arrancars. I feel bad for him... Just so you know, Harunobu Ogidou is 4th Division's 8th seat. He's that pretty-boy that Isane blushes over, you know? Yasochika Iemura is the 3rd seat blond who always wears shades. I don't know why, I wanted to make fun of him. (Goes off to find Aizen with duct tape and an armful of Barney videos)


	6. Cut

_Hello everyone! I'm so very sorry for the late post! I've started school and everything else unpleasant that starts when September rolls around. I must admit, I didn't plan this chapter much. I'm writing it in the car right now, so yeah... Please enjoy this chapter!_

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"Hey… Ichimaru…"

"Yes, Tosen-san?"

"Why have you been getting so much mail lately?" The question froze Gin momentarily, but he waved it off easily, the smile never disappearing from his face.

"Ah… But you know, I am homesick, so I'm receiving letters from the Soul Society. You know, junk mail and things like that, but I love to look through those catalogues they send you to advertise their shop… Yes! I know that I really shouldn't since it's Hueco Mundo and all, and I didn't even know that we got mail service here! But apparently some Arrancar here was ordering National Geographic magazine from the real world, and so the post was hooked up. I heard that what they do is that they send someone disguised as a human to pick up the things and then they come back here to deliver it. I had no idea about it, but I found out and just had to try an experiment of my own so I asked—"

"Stop talking to me," Tosen said curtly, and whirled away. Gin chuckled to himself and went back to his room from the mail room with his letter in hand. Now, babbling really _did_ drive people away…

Still chortling, he sat down at his desk in his room and opened the envelope. Many flat, rectangular items fell out of it. Eyebrows lifted in surprise, Gin picked one up and examined it carefully. It had a silver wrapping and smelled of strawberries. What in the three worlds?

Pondering over the strawberry-things, Gin unfolded his letter, where more of the mysterious items spilled out. "Ran-chan…?"

_Gin,_

_What happened to you?! Are you seriously injured? There are blood spots on this letter that I got! Did someone get rowdy? Were you picking a fight? Or… is Aizen really trying to kill you? If he is, then you really should write down rude things about him. I'm worried about you, you know. A letter covered in blood. Oh my goodness…_

_To be honest with you… I have heard people say that you are indeed unfortunately effeminate. I mean… you are an excellent fighter; strong, composed, and all that, but… Yeah… I'm sorry if I've offended you, or caused you trouble by, as you put it, making you smell like a woman, and you should see some sun once in a while. Until then, though… _

_You do, in fact, sound perverted. Go get therapy or something, because you're beginning to frighten me. Yes…_

_I'm sorry if I sound rushed or impatient, or anything like that, but there are many problems here in Seireitei. We've received a tip-off; someone said that we're about to get attacked by Aizen's army. I don't know if it's true or not, but we're not taking any chances. _

_Momo-chan is still in a coma, and her condition is likely to worsen if there is an attack. We are strong, but against Espadas? A captain level can only take down a Gillian without any problems. Gillians are the least of our worries. Do you know anything about this, Gin? I do not know whether it is right to ask you, but please tell me anything you know. It's not fighting fair, but I feel as if you are part of our side still. My captain is completely stressed right now. He doesn't stop for anything, not even to eat or sleep. I'm worried. We can't handle a war against Hueco Mundo! I'm not degrading Seireitei, but…._

_I'm sorry, Gin. I got caught up with all of the frustrations here and poured some of my steam into the letter. I could have started a new draft, but I'm afraid that I don't have any more time. Sorry for cutting it so short! _

_Love,_

_Rangiku_

_P.S. I think that I'm going to have to stop writing. There's just too much going on right now. I hope that I'll be able to write again someday, but I have to put it on a hiatus for now. I'm sorry. I love you._

"Oh… I do feel lower than a bug poop now…" Gin knitted his eyebrows and frowned. "I didn't know that Aizen was planning a war so soon. I didn't even know that he had a war in mind! Well… I kind of did, but I didn't expect him to go through with… Maybe he's not… But maybe he is… He doesn't trust me…"

Frustrated and worried simultaneously, Gin sat down on his bed and sank his face into his hands. What was he to do? He knew that he had to stop this potential war at all costs. Perhaps he could return to the Soul Society and warn them ahead of time, join forces with them if they allowed. Would they believe him, or would they see him as a liar? Maybe the only solution was to get rid of Aizen altogether…

"No, no, I can't do that," Gin chided himself, his voice muffled through his fingers. "If Aizen is found dead, everyone will know it's me. And I can't take Tosen and all of the Arrancars against me. Unless… they hate Aizen too…? Nah, I doubt it. What to do…?"

Another pang of worry hit him along with a pang of sadness. Rangiku was cutting contact with him, huh? There wasn't any more time in her schedule for things like letter-writing. She had been his main support in sticking out in Hueco Mundo for so long. Now what would his motivation for staying be? He really wanted to go back to the Soul Society…

Gin's eyes fell on the last sentence of the letter. He sighed; it seemed like it was just a joke, really, but it wasn't. At least, he hoped it wasn't. "Ran-chan… Ran-chan…" What should he do? Weakly, Gin lifted his head to look out the window. The clear black sky and white sand clarified his mind. Now he could think properly. He should go ask Aizen what his plans were. 

And, regardless of his answer, Gin knew what to do next. Hastily, he scribbled one last letter and stuffed it into the envelope Rangiku's letter had come in. the ink probably was blotting, and it would be near impossible to read once it reached Rangiku, but it wasn't an important letter this time. Grabbing his cloak on the way out of his room, Gin grinned again.

"I must remember top drop this off at the post office before I leave."

_-o-_

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Did you like it? I hope you did. But I am sorry to say that I am ending this fic with the next chapter. This file is weird, because it almost crashed my computer twice, and nothing seems to work, so I'm just going to finish it and hope that I might come back to this someday and add on to it. Last chapter ahead! (train whistle)


	7. Rolling Star

_Yay, the last chapter of this fic! (does Ikkaku's lucky-dance) Please enjoy!_

With a sharp sigh, Rangiku sank down on her knees in the middle of the tenth squad office. She didn't care that there were couches and chairs within her reach. She didn't care that she should still be working, despite it being midnight. The preparation for the potential war was draining the energy out of everyone in Seireitei, as well as Ichigo and the others. It was stupid, considering that the war may only be a rumor. But Rangiku didn't call the shots around Seireitei.

"All of this… What if this preparation is all pointless? Is Yama-jii working our butts off for nothing?" she grumbled, drumming her fingers on her knees impatiently. "I haven't heard anything from Gin yet… No, I probably can't count on him. He did follow Aizen on his own free will… I trusted him in my letters; he sounded so sincere. But was he lying?" As she rambled, Rangiku found her anger rising. Was he just saying things to her so that she would believe in him? Was he filling her mind with lies to make defeating Seireitei easier, like he had done to Momo Hinamori?

No… no… Rangiku shook her head. She was getting furious over nothing. It had only been a few days, after all. It usually took a little longer to receive his letters.

"It's official… I'm becoming delusional. Ah, damn Yama-jii! Hitsugaya-taichou already thinks that I'm crazy. Actually, I think the only person that thinks I _am_ sane is probably old man Kyoraku, because we're on the same drinking level. Ha, I haven't touched a drop of alcohol in days! I don't know if this is good for my body, or if my insanity is my withdrawal symptoms." She sighed and tugged on a strand of her golden hair. A knock sounded at her door, but as soon as she turned around she saw an envelope slide under the door.

"What—?" Rangiku reached for the envelope and recognized the spidery handwriting on the front. "…maybe Hanatarou doesn't want to talk to me since I accidentally tossed a brick at him. I didn't mean to! I meant to peg it to the ground, but it slipped out my hand… I really should apologize…"

The disgruntled Shinigami turned her back to the door again and took the letter out, placing the envelope in her lap. She raised her eyebrows at how short the scrawled message was.

_Ran-chan,_

_Sorry, I can't help myself!_

_Love forever,_

_Gin Ichimaru_

"What—?" she repeated, this time in confusion. "He can't help himself with what? What's the meaning of this note? He didn't really say anything! What the hell does Gin—?"

In the middle of her rant, a pair of arms slid around her shoulders from behind and hugged her tightly. Something—or someone—pressed gently into her hair and against her back. 

Normally, Rangiku would have yelled and pulled out her sword to attack her assailant, but she didn't. The arms were long, thin and pale and the person had a particular scent. A scent that took her back to life in Rukongai. "Heya, how've you been?"

"Foxy-faced bastard… How'd you get back to Seireitei, Gin?"

Tightening his grip on Rangiku slightly but comfortably, Gin Ichimaru grinned even wider. "Ah, you would never know. It near beat the reishi out of me! Actually… I'm not really sure how I got back! But I did get back, just to see you, Ran-chan."

"Really… Does Aizen know you're here?" Rangiku asked dryly.

"Oh, no!" Gin laughed, shaking them both. "No one knows I've come here, not even the Gillians, and since they guard the border, they know everything that goes in and out of Hueco Mundo. I even hand-delivered you the letter instead of going to the post office, you know."

"Oh, so it wasn't Hanatarou this time. I was scared that he wasn't talking to me! I was afraid that he was mad at me since I hit him with a brick earlier…" Rangiku sighed in relief.

Gin's arms froze rigidly around her. "You threw a brick at poor Hanatarou-kun?" he asked in a scandalized voice. "What on earth did he do to you? Or were you in a really bad mood? In which case… should I be running away?"

It was the captive's turn to laugh now. "No, it was an accident. And I didn't injure him, I just spooked him. It's kind of like throwing a rock at a cat, you know? He just jumped and said it was okay and ran away." Rangiku reached up and brushed her fingers against Gin's arm. "So? Are you really here only to see me, or are you leading an army of Hollows? Whose side are you on, Gin?"

The silver-haired Shinigami's smile turned sad. "I'm not leading anything, Ran-chan. I told you that I no longer agree with Aizen's ways. Don't you trust me?"

"I suppose…" Rangiku answered slowly. "But why did you go in the first place, then? If you don't believe in Aizen's philosophy, why did you leave Seireitei?"

Gin sighed. "I'm not really sure how to explain this… Well, Sosuke Aizen took me under his wing when I entered the Thirteen Gotei, right? He was like my first guardian in such a long time. Up to that time, I had lived with you, and then in a dorm for a year with classmates and teachers, but Aizen was like a father figure to me. He took to me and I wanted to please him, so I did what he asked without question, and always with a smile." He paused and chuckled. "I guess that doesn't say much, since I'm always smiling. But yes, I did what he asked. I killed the fifth division's third seat when he asked me. He said he was curious to see my true power, and I convinced myself that that was a valid reason to kill. I am ashamed of it now, and I wish that I had been assigned to a different squad, but it's too late to think of that now, isn't it? You're the 

author of your own life, but you write in ink so you can't erase your mistakes. But you can keep writing to make the best of your worst, right?"

"Wow," Rangiku muttered. "When did you get so philosophical?" She smiled. "Thanks for coming back to visit, Gin. Even if it is for just a while. Do you have to go back soon?"

"Yeah, sadly," Gin answered. "But before I go…" He removed one arm from around her and brought it back after retrieving something from his robe. "If you're willing to wait for a little longer, and if you're not too fed up with me, do you wanna marry me?" He held a ring in front of Rangiku's eyes. "I read that this is what proposals are like nowadays in a National Geographic magazine that one of the Arrancars was ordering! However, I suspect that Tosen was the one actually receiving them…"

Rangiku stared at the ring. "You are such a nerd, Gin," she muttered. She carefully shrugged his arms loose and turned around to face him. "Of course I'll marry you…" She let Gin slide the ring onto her finger. He was grinning, a genuine smile now, one of pure happiness. "Thank you, Ran-chan. My proposal wasn't an epic failure?" Gin murmured.

"No… not really." Rangiku gingerly took his face in her hands and kissed him lightly. "Now go," she said, pushing him away by the shoulders playfully. "You don't want to get in trouble now, do you? I don't want you to cross Aizen and get killed."

"That's true," Gin agreed. "I'll come back soon, though, and I'll fight against Aizen with all my power. But I'll come back alive."

Rangiku nodded. "It's a promise, and this ring represents it." She held up her left hand.

"I promise, Ran-chan. Bye-bye, now!" Gin stood up and helped Rangiku stand as well, and then moved towards the door. "Later, Ran-chan," he teased, and opened the door.

"Ah! Gin?" The young man paused with his hand on the doorknob. "Yes?"

Rangiku stifled a giggle. "Unless you want Hollows with exceptional sight to ask why you've decided to start wearing lip gloss, I suggest you wipe your mouth first…"

"…You make a very good point, Ran-chan. I might grab a shower here in Seireitei before I go to wash everything off completely, the border between here and Hueco Mundo was rather unsanitary, and—."

"Gin…"

"Right, leaving."

_-o-_

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And there you have it! My first multi-chapter fanfiction posted online is COMPLETE! (sighs happily) Yes, the entire plot of this story was based on that Gin/Ran hug scene in the fifth opening. To think, I just started with a prompt of "Gin and Rangiku writing letters to each other. A 'foxy-faced bastard' is the most appropriate thing to refer to Gin as." I hope that you liked the product of a plucky nerd finally courageous enough to share my works with the internet! Or a plucky nerd that finally figured out how to post stories on ! Yay...! This last bit was dedicated to Jeremy, my own Gin Ichimaru (kind of). Thank you all for reading "More Than I Can Say", for sticking it out this far, or for even bothering to click on this story. Love to you all! (-Aizen whines from the box he's been locked in with a Gillian and Barney videos-)

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